Depression is for the Rich
I have a friend named Liz who experienced several very difficult years in her life. She was married when she and her husband decided to adopt two children from Russia. They wanted older children, siblings, and not infants.
Then, just a short time before they were to travel her mother was diagnosed with cancer and her husband decided he wanted another woman.
In a matter of a few short days her life, the life that she had planned, was changed forever.
She put a short hold on the adoption, moved her mother into her home and then got on a plane to pick up her children. Alone.
Years later, after the divorce was final, the kids learned to speak English and went though years of counseling, her mother had died, and she had started a whole new career (and was flourishing by the way) I met her.
Her story was enough to make a grown woman cry. But she told it cheerfully and with grace.
I asked how she was able to manage through events that would have sent weaker women huddling under the blankets. And her response?
“Depression is for the rich. I have two children who depend upon me. I am a single parent. I don’t have time to crawl in my shell. After all, the end result is the same. The time will continue to pass. I can be productive or I can shrink. I choose to be productive.”
**SIDE NOTE** I am in no way implying that depression is choice for anyone. Depression is a real medical condition that must be addressed with your primary care physician or psychologist/psychiatrist.
Many of us never face the same challenges in such a short period of time but the lesson is clear. I’ve remembered it for 8 years now -
The time continues to pass. I CHOOSE how I pass it. I CHOOSE if I am productive or decide to shrink.
I don’t need my back against the wall to make a choice.
We all should take days where we are CHOOSING to do nothing, play with friends and family or just curl up and read a good (not work related) book.
But those should be choices.
And we should also CHOOSE to work through our challenges. There are only an unfortunate few who have significant medical challenges that make choices almost impossible. But the majority of us can CHOOSE.
What’s your choice?
